:: William Barrett Graves ::

Friday, April 15, 2005

My friend Barrett always had a unique sense of timing. Chronically both tardy and early, you could depend on him for calls in the middle of the night or weekend-long escapades together after which he'd disappear for a month. About three weeks ago, I received a random email from him. It said, in its entirety:

i just wanted to say that i love you guys. 

you know, in case you forget.

i especially wanted to say i love you in purple.

barrett

And just now I found out he died yesterday. That email is the last thing I'll ever hear from him.

I'll try to eulogize him better later on, once the shock wears off, but I wanted to say to everyone that I love you, in any color. I don't say it enough, but I do.

And if you knew Barrett, and can make it though this set of pictures without crying, you're a robot.

Posted by morland @ 04:52 PM

:: Comments ::

that is an email i'm going to keep for the rest of my life. we're hitting Finnegan's Wake tonight in remembrance.

Posted by: josh on April 15, 2005 08:52 PM

Barrett and I never quite got along and now, in hindsight, I can probably say that I did him more harm than he ever did me.

It's something I regret.

I will say that he had more potential in his fingernail than most people have in their soul.

And it saddened me that he didn't realize it.

Today, after hearing of his death, it saddens me even more.

Posted by: Sean on April 16, 2005 10:31 AM

Barrett was the best friend, the little brother of my heart. The last thing he said to me was "I love you, you know." His heart was bigger than any one body could contain, he was unique and sharing in his life is a gift of God. I would love to have copies of pictures of him emailed to me, silly and serious. He is over his struggles now, but I am not. Peace.

Posted by: Bruce on April 17, 2005 12:38 PM

I laughed and I cried looking at your pictures of Barrett. He was Barrett; there is no other way to describe him. He was his own man. His spirit was never really contained, perhaps the most free I've ever met.
"Life is short. Time is fleeting. Realize the Self. Purity of the heart is the gateway to God. Aspire. Renounce. Meditate. Be good; do good. Be kind; be compassionate. Inquire, know Thyself. "
~William Hazlitt
A quote that, to me, imbodies Barrett's personal philosophy.

Posted by: Paige on April 19, 2005 06:43 PM

I spent a month with Barrett in the summer of 1995. He learned the Lumberjack song for me and performed it in a skirt and bra surrounded by the manliest female lumberjacks we could muster.

The next spring he was my prom date, travelling all the way from Gallatin to Cookeville (and arriving late as I found out was his way). Without prior discussion, he matched my baby blue dress perfectly with a baby blue ruffled tux. Our pictures is straight out of the 60s. He was definitely psychic.

We accidentally went to the same college, accidentally took a year off before starting, and accidentally ended up in the same dorm. Somehow I still didn't see a lot of him, but the conversations we had were always wonderful and wacky.

Since then he has been terrible at returning both calls and emails, but he did show up randomly in Atlanta. We drank cheap Sangria and talked about the old days.

I guess he'll be worse at returning my emails now.

Posted by: claire on April 21, 2005 02:51 PM

I don't know how to really grieve. I was drunk just 4 hours ago when I heard that my old friend Barrett was gone. It was sobering, to say the least. The blogosphere may be the only way to express myself right now, at 3 in the morning, since my roomates are all out and the whiskey has run dry....

We met our freshmen year. Did some scenes, had some drinks, went to Atlantic City once, spur of the moment......I'll never forget it. He jumped into the Atlantic Ocean at 6 in the morning on a $20 bet, which we never paid him.........asshole for not collecting.

A fucking tractor??? Are you fucking kidding me with this, Barrett?

You're not a wasted talent, my friend. You're just a talent. And you make me better. I don't know if you know that or not, but I like to think that you're over my shoulder and you do now.

You can rest in peace if you like, my friend, but I hope that you don't. I hope you frolick and play and inspire for all eternity.
Save some heaven ladies for me.......

you're friend always,
ryan

Posted by: Ryan Tavlin on April 22, 2005 03:00 AM

I didn't have the pleasure of meeting Barrett until after we graduated college, however after hanging out with him in NYC I realized something that you guys already knew: He was one of the nicest, most genuine people I have ever met.

There is a definite shortage of people like Barrett in this world, and apparently heaven must have been a little low as well.

Take care my friend.

-Billy

Posted by: Billy Red on April 22, 2005 02:55 PM

Barrett was a friend of mine as well as my boyfriend's roommate. The last time I saw him was only a couple weeks ago as we laughed about my relationship spat. I will never forget Barrett with his organic food, his 3 fancy coffee machines, sleeping with all the doors open, leaving all the lights on, and tell Jordan and I funny stories.

It was an indescribely somber experience to watch as Barrett's family came to the apartment to collect his things. I almost felt like I knew them.

It is true that there aren't enough Barretts out there... and I miss him already.

Posted by: Laura on April 23, 2005 01:25 AM

Morland, I heard so much about you. I don't think I heard about any of his 'back home' friends, but you were the exception.

I will never forget how to act like a guy who has so....much....MONEY. "I am made of money."

Christ, those pictures are too much for me right now. Just thinking of how damn good he looked at Halloween....Barrett was a hotter woman than most women I knew.

Dammit, most of my friends have been through this before, I've never lost someone I felt this close to. Man, I had such love for you, Barrett. Such a damn wonderful guy.

Posted by: Nick on April 25, 2005 11:44 AM

i know this is coming extremely late and no one will ever see this but barrett was like the big brother i never had. he was my dads bestfriend in the entire world even if he was old enough to be his son. we met him through up with people when i was only 8 and he was one of the coolest people i knew. he remembered every birthday and sent a card it may have been early or late but around the time of my birthday. and he always talked to me when he called my dad even at 3 am. i love yes love as in the present tense barrett more than i can ever express and i miss him so much even after all this time so i can only imagine how his real siblings feel. he had the most amazing soul of anyone i have met or think i will ever meet. and i will always have a place in my heart saved for him.

Posted by: Olivia on December 14, 2008 09:55 PM

Olivia,
thank you so much for your lovely note. I just wanted to let you know that someone did see it, and was so touched to know people were still writing about Barrett that she teared up when she saw it.

Posted by: as on March 30, 2009 09:07 PM

It's coming up on 5 years, if you can believe it.....

Posted by: as on April 13, 2010 03:55 PM

Soon to be 6 years...seems forever ago...seems a moment ago. I love you Barrett and miss you forever. Olivia and I have a place for you with us always and forever.

Posted by: Bruce on January 12, 2011 12:48 AM

Not sure why Barrett popped into mind today. Just sitting here working and here he comes. My husband only met him the one time in Atlanta. We moved to Knoxville a year later and it always seemed empty without Barrett there. I still wish Nathan & Barrett could have hung out more. I think they are kindred spirits and would have been great friends. It's funny how time passes and some losses just never seem to fade.

Posted by: Claire on July 30, 2011 01:55 PM

- Post a comment -

« Free geocoding thanks to Google | Main | In which I use dark humor as a defense mechanism »