Man. Myth. Morland.: Instant oatmeal, messaging

Communicating with customer support teams is inherently demeaning to both parties, a fact which technology, with its ability to dehumanize through multi-tasking, doesn't help to counteract. Just when you think representatives' attention spans could not be stretched any thinner, along comes a way to shock the efficiency-service curve juuuuust a little more. Enter instant messaging.

The new medium is not, however, entirely without its benefits. It caters better to idle nonsense, for instance, even if it also makes such babble far easier to ignore. Being a pompous ass is easy when you can't see your interlocutor's face. It's even easier when you can't hear their voice.

Thank you for contacting SECURECORP. My name is Jen. How may I help you today?
Jen: Hello Morland
Morland: hello
Morland: did Angela forward you our corespondence?
Morland: or should I copy-paste it in?
Jen: Yes, one moment please
Jen: We are still looking into this for you.
Morland: Ok. I'll sit here and gaze longingly out the window at the rain, contemplating the oppresive ennui of corporate life
Morland: Now I have oatmeal, orange juice, and a banana. This alleviates some of the ennui, as well as my hunger. My hunger for a sunny day alas, has not yet been satiated.
Jen: Can I please have your organization name or order number?